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  • Writer's pictureNay

It's Been A While... Since Someone Held My Hand

I, for one, am not one to sweat the small things, and I believe most people should not. But it is interesting, when you realize that you haven't done something in a while. And though I am sure it has happened several times this past year, the mere fact I cannot remember when someone held my hand, suggest it has been a while.

A Huffington Post article stated that holding hands provides instant intimacy, another level of awareness, and a deeper connection. There seems to be some validity to that. Though holding hands on the surface level may not mean much to most, the metaphysical and metacognitive benefits should not be overlooked.

If I, or anyone, could capture a sense of that, I think we should.

We should want to comfort someone, however brief, to uplift them and connect more with them.

In other words, holding hands does not have to be a romantic gesture, or strictly ordained for romantic couples. Holding hands can just be a way of connecting more with someone, or showing them that you care about their feelings. We often categorize it as something more or something different, when that does not need to be the case.

No one should be afraid to hold hands with their family. No one should be afraid to hold hands with their friends.

Some of us may be coy about holding hands platonically, if we believe it is some sort of stereotypical public display of affection. But, that's not really what it is about. We have to stop projecting misguided views onto our lives, because we can sacrifice the aforementioned benefits for ourselves.

And I don't want to make that sacrifice. And I hope anyone reading this does not want to do that either.

One of the most common desires of people around the world is physical touch. The act of skin to skin contact is something we all crave, and when it happens, even as a brief as the touch of fingers, we instantly feel somewhat better.

Popular relationship author, Gary Chapman, considers physical touch as one of five love languages. And it seems most people have physical touch as one of their top two love languages when assessed

It can be daunting and it can be anxiety-provoking, but the mere act itself, can reduce those feelings of daunt and anxiety. Withholding handholding (see what I did there), can provide a lack of comfortability between you and others. A lot of research has shown that many people who were instructed to hold hands for an extended period of time felt better about themselves and the person they were touching from pre-touch to post-touch.

So, hold hands more. It seems to be worth it. Try and see.

I'll keep my hand extended, waiting for someone to hold it.... since it's been a while.

Photo Credit: Nagesh Badu


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